Why Don't Girls Like Nice Guys?
So, why don't girls go for nice guys? I've actually put a lot of thought into this because I always thought that I was the type of girl who went for nice guys. I thought that girls who dump nice guys were bitches because nice guys never do anything wrong.
I don't think that anymore. This change of opinion came about when I was reading The 4-Hour Workweek by Timothy Ferriss. He said that the opposite of love is not hate, but indifference (like the opposite of happiness is not sadness, but boredom). If you buy into that perspective, then the worst thing you can do to your girlfriend (or boyfriend) is bore them. It also explains why it's so easy to hate your ex just a few hours after breaking up with them - becuase hate and love are somehow similar not truly opposite.The thing about nice guys is that while they never do anything wrong, they also never do anything right. It is easy to be nice. It is easy to give your girlfriend gifts or take her out to nice places because it's fun. It's also easy to give in and let her have her way when you argue, especially if it's about something small, and that's the nice guy way. Nice guys put up with their girlfriend's bullshit (that's what makes them nice) and then they get dumped. After that they feel all bitter, they think "I did everything she wanted and she still dumped my ass, what a bitch," and never really understand what went wrong. What they don't get is that from a relationship point of view, being dull is wose than being an ass.
because this increases your chances of mating with at least one person with good genetics. If you are a caveman, however, it's going to piss you the hell off if your cavewoman "wife" ends up fucking other cavemen because if you die fighting of the Velociraptors to save some other dude's child your genetics
don't get passed down. So, what the cavewoman does is settle down with some nice caveman and secretly have sex with asshole cavemen as well behind her "husbands" back.
If we fast forward to today, genetic testing and child support make this whole model somewhat obsolete. However, deep down, we are secretly still all cavewomen and cavemen. To top it all off, religion has imposed monogamy on most women in the world nowadays. So a modern girl will start dating a nice guy be happy for a while. Then some genetic restlessness will start to kick in and she'll start craving some reproduction with the type of asshole who wouldn't settle down with her, but would fuck her. Assuming her modern religious morality stops her from cheating, she will eventually become so dissatisfied with her relationship that she'll dump her boyfriend and go
fuck some asshole for a while. Of course, this won't work out and eventually she'll get dumped or beaten up or something and then she'll probably go back to dating some nice guy.
So, what can you do about it? There are two options. The first, and probably most popular option, is to just become a bit of an asshole yourself to satisfy your girlfriend's asshole fix. This is especially true if she's dumping you - at this point you have nothing to lose so just bitch her the hell out. Stop short of beating the shit out of her though, because that's illegal and she'll probably dump your ass for some nice guy anyway. The second option is just to let her cheat (or have an open relationship). With birth control and genetic testing, there is no actual reproductive disadvantage to having your girlfriend sleep around anymore (although STDs still suckzor) so nice guys may be on the rise again.
I don't think that anymore. This change of opinion came about when I was reading The 4-Hour Workweek by Timothy Ferriss. He said that the opposite of love is not hate, but indifference (like the opposite of happiness is not sadness, but boredom). If you buy into that perspective, then the worst thing you can do to your girlfriend (or boyfriend) is bore them. It also explains why it's so easy to hate your ex just a few hours after breaking up with them - becuase hate and love are somehow similar not truly opposite.The thing about nice guys is that while they never do anything wrong, they also never do anything right. It is easy to be nice. It is easy to give your girlfriend gifts or take her out to nice places because it's fun. It's also easy to give in and let her have her way when you argue, especially if it's about something small, and that's the nice guy way. Nice guys put up with their girlfriend's bullshit (that's what makes them nice) and then they get dumped. After that they feel all bitter, they think "I did everything she wanted and she still dumped my ass, what a bitch," and never really understand what went wrong. What they don't get is that from a relationship point of view, being dull is wose than being an ass.
| So, if that's the case, why do nice guys ever get laid? The thing is, on some level girls do sort of want a nice guy. They want a nice guy to snuggle and marry, but not to exclusively have sex with. This can be explained somewhat if you rewind a few thousand years and look at a cavewoman (assuming you believe in evolution). If you are a cavewoman, you want to settle down with some nice gentle caveman who will fight off the Velociraptors and pick the lice out of your children's hair. This increases the chance of your children's survival and thus the chance that you get to continue your genetic line. However, you also want to have kids with a bunch of different people |  |
So, what can you do about it? There are two options. The first, and probably most popular option, is to just become a bit of an asshole yourself to satisfy your girlfriend's asshole fix. This is especially true if she's dumping you - at this point you have nothing to lose so just bitch her the hell out. Stop short of beating the shit out of her though, because that's illegal and she'll probably dump your ass for some nice guy anyway. The second option is just to let her cheat (or have an open relationship). With birth control and genetic testing, there is no actual reproductive disadvantage to having your girlfriend sleep around anymore (although STDs still suckzor) so nice guys may be on the rise again.